In your opinion-what makes couples start ';living for each other';?

i hear all the time about couple who have been married a really really long time and after one passes, the other one does too. or some couples make each other the center of their life.


but then i hear about couple who are just together and really love each other. but its not the main part of their life. and of course other couples just divorce and remarry over and over.





why do you think this is?? what makes some peoples relationships work like the first example? is there a secret or is it just destiny? what do you think?In your opinion-what makes couples start ';living for each other';?
A marriage is a work in progress, it really never stops changing and evolving. Every person is different and I think the persons in your last example are those that are more focused on being able to go it alone if something happens. A form of personal independence just in case the partner leaves or dies. And it seem to become a self fulfilling prophesy too, those that prepare for the worst are often those that does get divorced often too.





One of the worst days in my life was walking into my grandparents kitchen and seeing my grandmother stand by my grandfathers chair. She had tears in her eyes and she said; ';I guess you've heard that my best friend is dead now.'; That's how she look at my grandfather, he was her best friend, the one person in the world that she always could trust. Deep inside I wondered if she'd survive or if she'd die too. That's years ago and she's still here but she's not the same, she's faded, it's as if he took a big part of her with him when he left.





They were dedicated to each other and they looked after each other. There were no ';what if's'; it was him and her ';til death do us part';. During the hard times they found help and strength in each other and in the good times they enjoyed it together. As their lives changed they handled it and moved on, always looking to the other to see what they thought. They are/were both strong individuals that always stood their ground when it came to different issues. But, they were even stronger together and they knew it. It was a choice that they made, the togetherness that they had, and they worked on it constantly.





As a deep contrast I see my parents loving each other and living together but going at it alone. My mother had me as a teen and she had to make it on her own for years until she met my (step) father. To me it seems as she's always ready to manage things on her own. She doesn't discuss things with my father and he doesn't talk about things with her either. (Unless it's major decisions of course.) I think being a teenage mom made her ';hard'; and that she doesn't want to be dependent on anyone, just in case...





I got married ';til death do us apart';, just as my grandmother I'm married to my best friend. The day I stood looking down at him in a bed at the ICU listening to the Dr's telling me he might not live another day ... my whole world shattered. I couldn't see how I'd be able to live without him. He survived, but the road back has been long and hard on both of us. Still, I wouldn't trade it for anything else. I'm living the life that I want to live, with the closeness that I have to my husband. We know that one of us will have to pay the prize one day, but it will have been well worth it. Life and marriage wouldn't have been the same, or even worth it to us, if we hadn't made the commitment that we made (and are still doing).In your opinion-what makes couples start ';living for each other';?
i don't think that there is a secret to be able to stay with somebody for a long time.. if you are open to communication and love each other spiritually mentally and emotionally and there is a strong trust bond then anything is possible..